Sunday, June 17, 2012

Happy Father's Day

Time just flies. It seems like just the other day when I got the phone call from my brother who was sitting our my father’s bedside, waiting for the inevitable. I was taking a shower when the phone rang and we all knew the message that was waiting at the end of the line. Mother looked at me, gestured to pick up the phone, silent, unshed drops of liquid forming in the corner of her eyes. She was having breakfast. The rest of the day would be hectic and she quietly finished the last morsel of food, the last she would have as a married woman. A marriage that had lasted a good 35 years and 26 days.

I picked up the phone. It was indeed my brother and the conversation was short, though far from sweet. I told him to wait and quickly proceeded to the hospital to bring our father home for the last time. After a brief illness, though a painful one (mentally and physically), father would come to the home he built with so much love. He always said that he may not enjoy living in the house for very long. Providential, as it turned out. Just about three years he got to spend in the asset he built, scrounging around to pay for each brick. I was still young but remember the hardships we had to go through in life. There was always a whole lot of month left at the end of the money and despite that, the house came up, brick by brick. It was built in three or four stages, work stopping when the money ran out entirely. But in those last three years of dad’s life, he really got to see the fruits of his love and labour.
My father and me had a relationship that was always at loggerheads. He had a whole lot of expectations from me, I managed to pour cold water in all his wishes. I had always been a rebel, while he was looking for a conformist. Not that he did not allow us to tread the unknown, far from it. He told us to chart a path and cross the milestones. I, a man in a hurry, coupled with the exuberance and follies of youth, wanted to skip a few milestones and get straight to the destination. He told me, in order to be a General, you need to be a foot soldier first. I always thought that I was a born General, charting the course of history.

To be fair, he never ever told us not to follow our dreams, not to try out new things, not to walk down the road less travelled. He always told us to plan our moves and take calculated risks. In those teenage years, with the adrenaline rushing and the veins pumping, risks were there to be taken and walls to be scaled, without the slightest thought on what awaited at the other end of the drop and whether one would land on two feet. Much of what I am today is probably because of the little nuggets of wisdom drilled into my head by my father. I did not realise it then, but as the hair disappears from my head, the realisation dawns of the importance of a father who guides you in the course of history that you are trying to chart out of your life. Failure was important to him, as it is to me. Without failure there can be no success. Failure only happens the last time one refuses to get up and walk again.
Born in a one-bullock-cart-village in the interiors of Mymemsingh (now in Bangladesh), the fourth child of a school teacher, growing up in a house with almost a hundred members, my father went on to lived a cherished life, rising up to the second senior most officer in the Indian Army, the first India Green Beret ( a la Rambo), starting the Commando Wing for the Indian Army, becoming a jungle warfare and counter insurgency expert, representing India multiple times in football, being felicitated and awarded by the President of India with the highest military award granted in peace time, being part of the Monitoring Committee for selection of the India archery and shooting teams for the Commonwealth Games, Asian Games and Olympics, he came a long way. The dusty road from Usthi, Mymensingh to the sprawling home in Aurangzeb Road, Delhi sure was an interesting journey.

The journey finally ended when cancer got the better of him. Lung cancer for someone who was as fit as the proverbial fiddle, an international level athlete and sportsman, yoga almost till the end, no smoking, no drinking. He lived a full life though and I hope I can live half a life as eventful and rewarding as him. Today is not special for me since he is in my mind and heart every day. But given the fact that people want us to go out of our way to say that we remember our respective fathers, I thought it opportune to pen a few words in his memory.
I love you. Thank you for breathing life into my heart and bringing me to this world. Happy Father’s Day.

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